Better Communication-Better Outcomes

by Mary Ann on July 24, 2014

Books with true principles change lives

Books with true principles change lives

Some books just change your life! When I was in fourth grade the book was The Hundred Dresses by Eleanor Estes. When I was sixteen it was the play Our Town by Thornton Wilder. When I was twenty the scriptures felt powerful to me for the first time. In myThe Hundred Dresses early thirties it was The Magic of Thinking Big by David J. Schwartz. In my late fifties I discovered 8 Minute Meditation by Victor Davich and in my early sixties You Can Heal Your Life by Louise Hay. Of course this barely scratches the surface of the books I have read that have given me a new paradigm and brought me to a place of change. Reading a book filled with true principles, whether a novel or other type of book can be an amazing experiencing.

A few weeks ago I read another book which has changed me and the way I communicate forever! Then I had the privilege of meeting the author and I asked him to share some of his thoughts with you. I hope after you read them that you will read his books. Your family relationships will be forever changed if you do.

Remember the Ice

Bob Nicoll is a Wordsmith. He teaches people that, “There is Power in the Clarity of your Articulation.” Another way of saying that is: “Words mean things.” Or, “Word Choice has behavioral consequences.” As the author of two books focusing on enhancing your communication skills, he has spent the last 23 years fine tuning a skill set for teaching the power of BETTER Word Choice.

Bob and I will be teaming up on an upcoming event to be held in the Salt Lake City area to share these concepts specifically for parents. We anticipate this event to be offered in September. Watch my posts and my Facebook Fan Page for more information. I think you will LOVE what we have to say!

Here’s BOB:

Imagine being able to create a simple message.

You know in your mind what you would like to convey.

You get ready to share it with one of your precious children.

You open your mouth, speak your mind, and then realize you have attracted the opposite of what you want. vase

Huh??? What’s that  you say?

All you said to your precious 6 year old was, “Don’t touch that vase.”

Seconds later, you hear the sound of broken glass and your favorite , imported, crystal vase is on the floor in a myriad of pieces.

So why would he touch it after you specifically said, “DON’T touch that vase?”

Before I share the answer, let share a quick story.

It all began on July 23, 1991 — at 10:07AM PDT

In a convenience store on Northern Avenue in Phoenix, AZ, the manager had placed a couple of signs above his cash registers. His intention was to encourage his patrons to buy more ice during the hot desert summer. I lived across the street from this store and came to know him. Rick was working one day as I made a purchase. This time I paused and asked him how his ice sales were going because I am intrigued by word choice and the resulting behavioral outcomes.

You see, the signs above the cash registers read:


I asked Rick how sales were going. His reply was less than favorable. I paused and asked if I could make a suggestion. I mean, after all, this was Phoenix—in the desert—in the middle of the summer. (110+ degrees in the shade)

“Rick, do you have a couple of pieces of paper and a magic marker?” I inquired. He gave me the items and I quickly made two new signs for him.


I left with a knowing smile and purposely stayed away for about a month.  When I went back to the store, I spoke with Rick about his recent ice sales.  “What did you do?  My sales are up over 500% in the last 30 days!!”

I smiled and asked him a simple question:   “If I say to you: Don’t think of the color blue. What color are you thinking of?” “Why blue of course” he replied.

“Of course.”

Now if I say “don’t forget the ice”, what will you forget?

“Hmmm… the ice.

“ “Right.”


Do you see how the innocent and commonly used message of “DON’T touch the vase” resulted in a broken vase? Our mind has no conception of NOT, and we proceed to DO what follows. So, the end result is, 6-year old Tommy is compelled to touch the vase; BECAUSE you told him to.

Words mean things. Word choice has behavioral consequences.

If we had just said, “leave the vase alone”, or “no touching the vase,” the end result is you would have a beautiful piece of crystal to showcase your flowers.

Bob NicollBob Nicoll has a passion for linguistics and empowering language choices. Since completing his Bachelor’s Degree in Psychology in 1972, and Masters in Counseling in 1974, he has focused his energies on studying the power of word choice: the Psychophysiology of Words.

Bob has been a counseling psychologist, a business owner/consultant, a motivational speaker, a sales trainer, restaurant owner, financial planner and a top sales manager. His passion is helping people shift their paradigms with respect to empowering word choices.

For more information about Remember the Ice and how you can significantly enhance your communication skills, go to and take a look around. On Bob’s product page, you will find his two books: Remember the Ice and Other Paradigm Shifts and Exceptional Care for Your Valued Client available in a digital download as well as on Kindle, for only $5.99. Bob is also available for presentations, coaching and seminars.

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