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Example of how children learn through play

by Mary Ann on April 29, 2011

Our Creation Box

I have often said that you should have a junk box; actually, in our house, we call it a creation box. In that box goes anything that you might otherwise discard or put in your kitchen junk drawer; (Confess, we all have one!), old keys, toilet paper tubes, tin foil, odd game parts, cast off Legos, pie tins, plastic spoons, empty spools, etc. This is one of my grandchildren’s favorite things.

Sometimes the box is in my Closet and sometimes it is in the regular play area and sometimes it just disappears for a few months. I keep them guessing. They never know when it will appear.

Children gain confidence from "working it out"

My daughter Jodie has been gathering stuff in her creation box. Because Maggie has Cerebral Palsy she has never used it and Jodie felt that Jack, at barely three, was still a bit too little. But children have a way of really surprising us.

The other day Jodie was doing some cleaning and had the box sitting out. Without saying anything Jack began to explore the contents. Then he had an idea. He began thinking about elephants. That idea became a plan or picture in his mind as he sorted through the junk. Then without saying anything to his mom he put his plan into action. Here is a picture of what he made all by himself. (He did finally ask his mom for help to tape the nose on.)

Aren’t you amazed? Isn’t this just the most creative thing you have ever seen?

Elephant with circus hat

Now it will hang on the family room wall for a few days. Eventually it will get a tear here and a tear there and will soon be discarded. But for now it is a shining example of the creativity of a child.

Here is the important part; children learn through play, play that may look to adults like meaningless, directionless, frivolous time-wasting. Play that uses resources, tape, glue, paint, paper and so forth. Play that results in items that only last a few days and then are discarded.

However, what has happened in Jack’s brain through the process of creating? He came up with an idea. He turned the idea into a plan. He looked at the available materials and figured which ones fit into his plan. He put the parts together on his own, asking for help only when it was needed.

Can you see all the useful skills that Jack practiced while creating this elephant? Can you see how going through this process over and over again can contribute to building his self confidence in his ability to think and problem solve? Can you see how it would influence his ability to trust himself? Can you see how Jack is maturing as he plays?

Play is an important part of a child’s learning and growth. In fact, children learn best through play.

For more information on the formative aspects of play see Ways of encouraging creativity and creative thinking in children and The power of play and executive functioning skills in children

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Great changes are made with small consistent efforts

by Mary Ann on April 28, 2011

Little children want to be in the middle of it all!

On Saturday I taught Jack, Maggie and Mary about germs and hygiene. It was chaotic. Mary was on the table and into everything. Jack wanted his own way. Maggie of course needs LOTS of help. Whew. Did they get any of that?

Monday, a full three days later, a miracle happened at dinner in the Palmer home. Out of the blue Jack said, “When you sneeze water comes out of your mouth.” He then proceeded to tell his mom and dad about how to blow your nose the right way, how to throw the tissue away so others don’t get sick and all about germs. AMAZING.

This brings me to what I want to remind you about today, the 1% principle (Concentrate on one right thing for consistent improvement ). I have talked about it before but it can’t be repeated too often. It is a principle which if understood and believed can free up moms and dads from quilt they feel when they think they are not doing enough, things aren’t going right or their expectations are just not being met. It can free them from perfectionism and allow them to just enjoy being with their children.

The 100% devil is a liar. Don't believe him!

Real growth comes from building on a solid consistent, right 1% improvement over time. However, we tend to live with and accept the 100% devil who says that if we aren’t doing it all right now in just the right way then we aren’t going to get a good result. Don’t believe the 100% devil. Just plan to improve 1% at a time consistently.

Back to the germ example. It was chaotic. We moved through the items quickly because of short attention spans. There were lots of interruptions while I was telling them something. How in the world could this turn out good.

Even I, with all of my experience, can still have some silly expectations sometimes. Kids are going to sit quietly and hang on your every word. They are going to put their hands on the paper correctly and put the stickers where they go and want to play all the games and sing all the songs. Please, let’s get real. That isn’t how it usually goes.

However, if you are clear about the 1% principle, that great changes are made with small and consistent efforts, then it will be acceptable; you will know in your heart that they are getting it; just like Jack. Three days later is a long time for a three year old.

Let me give you another example of the 1% principle in action. The Palmers have a family mission statement. They say it every

The Joyful Palmer's are a Team

morning. One morning I was left in charge of devotional and I got to lead the reciting of the family mission statement. The first line goes like this – “The Joyful Palmers are a team. Yeaaa.” Well, as we began to recite that line the 16 month old raise her little fist into the air and yelled Yeaaaa. You see, she is 16 months old and the 1% principle is already at work in her life. She is getting it through consistency and repletion. You can bet this one line, understood at 16 months, will make a difference in her life.

If you do not yet have a family mission statement check out A Family Mission Statement: Part 1

For a better understanding of the 1% principle I recommend that you read Raving Fans by Ken Blanchard. It is a business book that translates perfectly to families. After all, aren’t you trying to get your children to be your raving fans?

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How to trust ourselves and not quit

by Mary Ann on April 27, 2011

Don and Mary Ann

I saw a video today that got me to thinking about my experience as a parent. When Don and I married we were full of hope for a happy life and a perfect family. We had been taught certain core values all of our lives and we had done our best to live them. We had put some consistent behaviors into our routines that we thought would really carry us far in our efforts to raise happy and healthy children.

Yet, everything didn’t go as we planned. We realized that in our life path were some significant bumps that could trip us up and they did. Some we didn’t even see until we were on the ground, taken totally by surprise. It was difficult to trust in ourselves and not quit.

The best part of parenting - grandchildren

We had a couple of major crashes in our family. Other families raced by us and it seemed as if we couldn’t possibly reach the finish line with an intact and healthy family. It was tempting to just stay down, lick our wounds and lament over the fact that the path hadn’t been cleared out for us better, that bumps and stones had been placed in our way, that those families running alongside of ours had it easier. Their lane was free of bumps and obstacles, or so it seemed.

However, we did the wiser thing. We got up and kept running. It wasn’t easy. It wasn’t easy to

The second best part of parenting - adding new children to the fold

watch families whose children seemed to be doing everything right. It wasn’t easy to go to church and hear how another child was making all the right choices or how amazingly loving another marriage was. It wasn’t easy to sit in the school auditorium as other children earned awards and got great grades. It wasn’t easy.

It wasn’t easy to not quit. It wasn’t easy to not fall into the trap of reiterating all our failures as parents or to not compare ourselves to all the success of others, as if they had no failings. It wasn’t easy to continue to trust ourselves that we could and would prevail. It wasn’t easy.

Here is the fact. We won! Despite our falls and being behind in the race, we won. A couple of

It is pictures like this that are an indication of our AMAZING paenting skills : )

weeks ago I heard two of my daughters talking about our family. They raved about our solidarity and our goodness as people. There was no mention of how much Don and I struggled as parents, how individuals in our family had fallen down and had had to rebound; only happy words and glad memories and comments on how good it all was in the present.

Falling down, failure, weakness, foolishness, these are some facts of life. What saves us is the getting up and going again. It is courage and faith that make all the difference (faith makes things possible, not easy). So if you are discouraged in yourself or your spouse or your children or your family, then get up. Read some more. Practice a new skill. Change yourself. Pray, pray and pray some more. Keep running. I’ll bet, like us, you too will win!

WE WON!!!

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How to learn and remember things better

by Mary Ann on April 26, 2011

A diamond is a transparent gem

The words translucent, opaque and transparent came up quite accidentally. My granddaughters, ages 5 and 7, had decided to find out what crystals were and how they are made ( Teaching chemistry to kids) . During that adventure we looked at many books on rocks and gems.

Gupreca Phenite is a translucent gem

As they would ask me about each picture I would read them the caption. The words translucent and opaque kept coming up. So we took some time to talk about the words and what they meant. Then I added transparent to the mix. We spent a fun fifteen minutes touring the library looking for items that fit each word.

Turquoise is an opaque stone.

I never thought another thing about it until today. I was making a delicious pie filling. As I cooked the mixture I noticed that it is very opaque when I start and the way that I know it is done is that it becomes translucent. That got me to thinking. When Ashley and Lizzy are here next time we are going to make pie and I am going to point that out to them. That will help them learn faster and remember more.

Just recently I made a batch of play dough using my favorite recipe(play dough recipes). It is always difficult to explain how you can tell when it is ready to knead. What I look for is that the mixture changes from opaque to a translucent look. It isn’t actually translucent but it has that look. I can tell every time when it is ready. Ashley and Lizzy will just have to make play dough too.

I began thinking about all the times in my everyday life that those three words come up: transparent, translucent and opaque. I have many opportunities to mention them to my grandchildren if I am paying attention and by way of repetition and connecting them to very ordinary everyday events they will soon learn the words, what they mean, and not forget.

It is that way in all aspects of teaching children. It reminds me of my favorite quote by George Turnbull: “By familiar conversation, children’s curiosity may be roused much more effectually, and by it they may be taught a great deal more in a little time, than can possibly be done in the austere magisterial way of calling them to a lecture.” George Turnbull, 1742

I was thinking about that in terms of making this pie today. Normally when making pie with our child we chat about this and that and miss an opportunity to teach a concept because it never comes to mind. In order to have more opportunities to teach in this way we need to think and be paying attention.

A water strider uses surface tension to move without sinking.

When milk spills and is rolling across the table, instead running for the towel we might just take a moment and ask our children why it is rolling along but there are some drops that are just sitting still, thereby having a familiar conversation about surface tension. That might lead us on an expedition to the nearest duck pond to watch water skippers use the concept to move along without sinking.

Take this past Easter holiday for example. Did you boil eggs to color? Did you think to ask your children why there was more water in the pan before you began cooking than after? Did you point out the steam and ask your children what it was, opening a whole familiar conversation on the fact that some elements can be a liquid, solid or vapor.

Two weeks ago I helped a group of third graders make sugar eggs. I was so amazed at the many opportunities that came up in this craft project that reinforced science and some math concepts.

I asked them why you had to be careful not to put too much water in the sugar. Someone responded that even though sugar is a solid if you add to much water it melts into a liquid.

I asked why you have to be careful to not put too much frosting or decorations on top of the egg. Then a conversation about translucence took place and the fact that even though the sugar crystals are stuck together there are still spaces between them letting in the light.

I instructed them to put a bead of frosting around the outer edge of the egg shell so they could be stuck together. Someone piped up, “That’s the perimeter, right?”

If we are working, playing and listening to our children there are many opportunities every day to teach and reinforce concepts of math, science, history, health, etc, using the every day events and circumstances in our lives. What a great way to learn and to remember.

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