Yesterday I wrote about my daughter’s experience with building a raised bed garden and walk way. She said “While I was building it, it was exhilarating. It was so exciting and rejuvenating”. Building that garden gave her a wonderful sense of “this is the most fun thing I have ever done!”
Yesterday I related this story to The Spark Station and the experience that we want our children to have as they are learning new things. Today I want to relate it to “filling our own buckets”. If you have ever taken a workshop on finding your purpose or having a happier life and the like, many times they ask you to go back to your childhood and think about what really made you happy. Maybe they do that because children do what they like and love. Parents work and stress and stop dreaming. It is a malady that these workshops are trying to help us over come.
Recently a mentor of mine asked me “What do you really love. What fills your bucket? What rejuvenates you?” I couldn’t really answer her. I have a number of things that I enjoy. I like to read and bake, sometimes. I like to weed and plant, sometimes. I usually do those things when I need a break from work. Can anyone relate?
But thinking about what I really love doing, what makes me feel joy and happiness, that fills me up, that was a tough assignment. I haven’t figured it out yet because I haven’t taken the time. However, in relation to the story about my daughter I have decided to take the time.
The reason for that is because when she had that remarkable sense of daily exhilaration she felt more whole, more satisfied, more happiness. Now she has a busy life. Her little ones are up early and require her all day long. Add to that keeping house, tending pets, taking care of a husband and her business and by the end of the day you have a very tired woman. This happens to men too.
So as she was telling about this experience she said that she really thought about the joy of building the plane and the joy of building the garden and walkway. She realized that what she loves to do is build, with a hammer and nails and a saw. She likes building things. She knows that she doesn’t do much of the very thing that builds her up and gives her joy. So her job now is to figure out a way to add that element into her life. When she does, no matter how long or stressful the day, she will manage better because she can look forward to the rejuvenation and happiness that come when she builds something.
As I have thought about this I can see the value in it. If we had opportunities when we truly felt joy, exhilaration and excitement we would be better mothers, fathers, grandparents, neighbors, friends and people. It would really enhance our ability to problem solve instead of blowing up or becoming depressed. It would ease the stress of modern life. It would add to our patience and our ability to reach out to others, to forgive and to love. But the key is in knowing what brings us this feeling.
Maybe you think I overstate the case but I have lived a good many years and I don’t think so. So I have made a decision to really think back. To do the work to remember, so that I can figure out how to better fill my bucket. Then I can give more to you, my family, my friends and my community. And above all the quality of my life will be so much better. Someone once said that life is not a dress rehearsal. This is the real deal so lets find ways to live a life of quality and fulfillment.
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